he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Randomize
