You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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