dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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