is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize