Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
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hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
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I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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