your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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