Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Randomize
