I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Fuck me I smell like cheese
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
