If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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