hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
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