Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
