He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Randomize
