I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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