they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
