i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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