would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
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i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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