Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Randomize
