whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
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