Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
