"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Apparently you make a good broom.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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