I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
time to smoke my breakfast
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Randomize
