Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
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