Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
