We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
