I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
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You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
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Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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