Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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