I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I'm just crazy horny about you
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
