I can text with my tongue
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
