Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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