NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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