Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Randomize
