He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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