you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
