Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
