You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Your penis caused this!
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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