white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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