i barfeds in our rink
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
