Where did you get a picture of my penis
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
