All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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