Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
i out mim tonsoeep
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