what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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