come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize