it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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