i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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