but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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