Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Randomize