Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Randomize
