Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
