This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
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