i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
