Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
